It seems that today's Christian parent is constantly looking for help on how to rear their children. There are many books in Christian bookstores on parenting, but although much of the parenting advice is from a Christian perspective, it is not truly biblical. Christian parents need to understand and apply the principles that the Bible sets forth in order to bring up their children in a way that honors Christ. An old Chinese proverb says, "One generation plants the trees and another gets the shade." We benefit from previous generations. Our parents provided a moral grounding in what is right and wrong. There were absolutes that provided great security for us as we matured into adulthood. But the greater question for us today is this; what are we planting for our children? What are we doing right now, that will provide for the next generation of our children? The sad truth is that we live in a society where the focus is upon ourselves, not upon our children. We want what we want and there is little regard for others.
I am thankful for ministries such as Grace Baptist Academy, and for parents who realize the importance of investing in the lives of their children. Let me give you some thoughts today on the subject of Christian parenting.
Intro: The Decline of the Family
A. Signs of the family's collapse.
1. The term is being redefined to include every imaginable combination of individuals and their sexual preference.
2. Many consider marriage optional at best, and others think it is totally obsolete.
3. Abortion, homosexuality, radical feminism, all are signs of the family's collapse.
B. Anti-family values of our society.
1. Television dominates home life.
2. Killing an animal is criminal; yet killing unborn human infants is defended as a matter of choice.
3. There are those in government right now who would like to hand over to the federal government the rights and responsibilities of child rearing.
4. Some want to move us closer to state-sponsored parenting, and eventually eliminate the family.
C. In light of our modern culture…
1. What can we as Christians do to plant shade to protect our children?
2. We begin with an understanding of scriptural principles of parenting.
I. Children Should Be Seen As A Blessing, Not a Hardship
A. Children are a sign of God's loving kindness.
1. After Adam and Eve rebelled against God and ate of the forbidden fruit, they were allowed to have children.
2. God multiplied the pain of childbirth (Gen. 3:16), but He did not nullify the blessing of children.
3. When Cain was born Eve said, "I have gotten a man from the Lord" (Gen. 4: 1).
4. The Lord was the source of the child.
5. When Seth was born Eve said, "For God has appointed me another seed" (Gen. 4:25).
6. Children are blessed gifts from God.
B. The parents who gave birth to the tribes of God's chosen people.
1. When Leah gave birth to Rueben she said, "…Surely the LORD hath looked upon my affliction…" (Gen. 29:32).
2. When Simeon was born she said, "…Because the LORD hath heard that I was hated, he hath therefore given me this son also…" (Gen. 29:33).
3. When Rachel gave birth to Joseph she said, "God hath taken away my reproach" (Gen. 30:23).
4. There are so many biblical illustrations and examples to demonstrate that children are a blessing from the Lord.
5. Psalm 127:3-5 is a wonderful example.
(Psa 127:3-5) Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. {4} As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. {5} Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.
II. Parenting Is Supposed To Be A Joy, Not A Burden
A. Parenting can become a burden.
1. We make parenting a burden when we fail to follow the principles of the Lord.
2. When we neglect our duty as a parent, we forfeit the blessing God intends for us to have.
B. Real joy comes when you bring your child up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
1. This is especially true of discipline.
2. It may seem distasteful, but discipline will ultimately produce joy when we are faithful to the Lord's instructions.
(Prov 29:17) Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul.
3. Many of us can remember our parents saying to us just before a spanking, "This is going to hurt me more than it is going to hurt you."
4. When I became a parent I knew that was true.
5. But when we do parenting God's way it will produce joy.
III. Success in Parenting Is Measured By What the Parents Do, Not By What the Child Does
A. The outcome of the child is not the gauge of the parent's success.
1. Sometimes children raised in Christian homes grow up and abandon the faith.
2. The Lord also has redeemed many children that were not raised in Christian homes.
B. The measure of success is the parent's own character.
C. We are a success when we parent God's way.
IV. A Child's Most Important Influences Come From the Parents, Not Peers
A. Parents do not have the prerogative to delegate their duty to others.
1. No other influence should take precedence over their influence.
2. Parents like to blame their child's failures on a variety of other influences.
3. Ultimately the parents are to blame for allowing these other influences to take precedence.
B. Too Often Parents have abdicated their role.
1. God has given the responsibility of rearing children to the parents!
2. That means that we will be held accountable before God for how we do this.
3. If we have turned our children over to other influences that shape their character in ungodly ways, we will be held accountable for this as well.
C. Parenting is a full time responsibility.
(Deu 6:7) And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.